Monday, May 31, 2010

Fuck Your Fixed Gear Bike

I get sent emails every day for submissions and the like. 90% of which for some reason happen to be unknown rappers trying to get me to post their mixtape or some shit.

This graphic was sent to me from Irish Pat.

He said he couldn't stand fixed gear bikes.

Fair enough.

Me neither.

Well that is not entirely true. I own one. I ride it a few times a week and like Irish Pat I was of the mind set that fixed gear bikes were for hipster fuck heads.

You: "Oh my god this is like finding out Santa Claus is not real, how could you do this to us SDTW?"

Allow me to explain. I realized that disliking bikes was pretty lame after a while. I mean using that logic you could make the same argument that cars are for hipsters.

For example:

You and a friend are walking in the city and some dude with a purple American Apparel hoodie, plugs, and a "Death Before Dishonor" chest tattoo, goes zooming by while he is listening to his dubstep remix of a M.I.A album.....does it matter if that dude was on a bike or in a car?


I mean I get it dude. The whole blog culture around bikes is a little over kill. Like close up shots of bike seats and lug nuts or whatever the fuck and I can not say I am really into the videos or brands either. I just simply like riding somewhere while listening to Slayer or Madlib and scoping out the city. It beats the fuck out driving any day.

So let's be specific with our contempt my friends.

Let us not judge SOLELY by the lowest common denominator, but by very acute and specific examples of lameness. Also as a once card carrying member of the "Fixed Gear Riders Are Just Failed Skateboarders Club" I urge anyone that may have doubts about bicycles of any kind to borrow one and see what you're missing out on.


  1. Jesus, you're a clown SDTW. "I just like riding around listening to Slayer or Madlib" You're a name dropping faggot. Wasn't two weeks ago you were like "peep this slayer band, turns out they pretty good, i used to be a pussy and not listen to them but now i don't care what people think." Truth is you do care, you just know that metal shit is edgy now, you're worse than these fixed gear bikers for that one.

  2. haha that dude ^^ is butt hurt

  3. hipsters listen to dubstep? That's new. I never really seem them out at shows.

  4. ^they do now that it blew the fuck up. take it back 5 years - "whatstep?"