Thursday, March 31, 2011

Based Soccer



Dude does the cooking dance after his goal.

Trying To Catch That Fame Wave To Street Cred Town


This dude.

How hard can one dude try?

Let's break down the contents of this street assassin's kit

Bike lock
= so you're on a bike, fair enough. Locks gotta lock.

Krink Markers (all three of them) = 3 unused markers from the Krink 2011 Catalog. Got that back up marker for that back up marker?

Camera = non film camera? Talk about a tumblr fail.

Sunglasses = In case you catch your own reflection and you're shining too hard.

Knife = You whittling a wooden figurine?

Can Of Montana Black = Ultra tech German Montana with the crazy ill burner tip.

Blackberry = fair enough standard item.

Business cards = In case someone doesn't recognize you from your 4,000 self portraits on the internet.

Two bags of caps = 42 caps is too many, 41 caps is just the right amount.

Military stickers = two stickers to spark the revolution.

Janitor's Keys = in case one of the teacher's needs something out of storage.

Bike pump = Inflate your ego or your tire.

No press is bad press as far as the internet is concerned EIKNARF

It's The Return


This kid has it figured out.

Really really really recommended.

Click the shit

Yo DJ Michael 5000 Watts please chop and screw this shit pronto

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Cosmo


Thnx Tob

I Heart The Internets


Just got back from the clinic.

Got some jimmy hats and and took a picture with some bitches we met.

SDTW Fan Art



Props to the New Zealand homie

SDTW Internet Matches



New feature we're starting here simply called

"SDTW Internet Matches"

It should be very clear how this feature works.

If it is not clear don't trip because Darwin tells us that people like you will die off because of your inability to adapt and thus survive to breed.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Current Vibes


My level homie.

Get on it.

?



Whoa, whoa, whoa, you're telling me Ben Affleck and Matt Damon predicted the future?

Friday, March 25, 2011

Riot Van

SDTW Tees?


Ah yeah dawg. We were waiting for the precise moment to announce that SDTW is now a full on clothing line. That moment is now.

Our first offering will be these custom cut and sewn pocket tees.

These joints will get you wild amounts of pussy. They're made out of whatever the hell t-shirts are made out of and they have our name on them somewhere.

If you rock this mad tumblr dudes will take your picture and sandwich your photo between a naked bitch smoking and photo of some gay ass shoes that my grampa wears.

Now taking pre-orders:

I Heart The Internets


Why you trying to mess with the homie's girl dawg?

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Are You Racist?




If you laughed then you are a racist!

Sike!!!

Everyone chill.

Meyhem Lauren


This dude and Action Bronson are good.

Nice to hear New Yorkers not pretending to be coke dealers.

Too bad they only post albums to iTunes so I can't listen to them.

I found this one.

It's good.

Get it.

Meyhem Lauren Butter Mixtape



Listen yourself if you doubt the God.

Monday, March 21, 2011

I Heart The Internets


Everyone was/is on Charlie Sheen's dick just because the dude does drugs and said some wild shit on t.v. The dude didn't fucking invent being a coke head. Give me a fucking a break. All this "winning" bullshit? Corny as fuck.

What's not corny?

These two dudes straight clownin' the KKK with a camera phone.

Get on that level.

Ha




Outclassing is the new beef.

Thnx

GETNLOOSE

Never a good look...

Clownin



6th Grade Style All Day Everyday

Pusha T


Decent little mixtape from Pusha.

No Drake and no Kanye.

Coincidence?

Get It Here

This Is How I Feel About Blogging Sometimes


Bill Murray vibes

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Harmony Korine Movies Suck

Sorry, there is no clever graphic, gif, or rant to illustrate these sentiments.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Tony Hawk's BFF Is 'Totally Cool' With Him Dating His Wife


Probably the least newsworthy headline ever.

What makes this shit even more pointless is it takes negative 5 seconds to see how cross eyed this bitch is.

Which camera are you smiling for hun?

The headline should've been:

Tony Hawk a.k.a world's best wingman saves buddy from being married to a lazy eyed dump.

SDTW Photoshop Skillz


Before Based God there was Busey.

Happy Patty's Day


Now some people accuse this holiday of being pointless (in America) however, there is way more meaningless shit we celebrate than this.

And correct me if I am wrong, but the only thing that is a tradition is you have to wear green and get drunk.

So basically if you're a garbage man then this shit is what you would call "work".

Welcome Back P

To make up for that last "song"...


Here is some spacey dream fuzz from The Stepkids, a group of musicians from diverse musical backgrounds who seem to have formed like Voltron and figured out how to tickle fuck my ears with some crucial meltyness in the quest for real music made with actual instruments. Crazy concept, yes I know. Enjoy.

Rebecca Black Screwed Up....



I'm assuming this is how the majority of the pilled out moms that have to play this trash for their mistakes hear this song.

Can't wait for her "Autotune Phase".

Note: No disrespect to the late Dj Screw

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Al Franken Predicts The End Of The Internet


SDTW does its best to not get all "ZEITGEIST" about shit cause that shit is for the birds, but I personally have read A LOT of articles regarding "Net Neutrality" and that shit is no joke.

Read the following excerpt. Not only is it disconcerting, but Al Franken also "sons" the fuck out of the Black Eyed Peas which just makes it that much better.


As an opponent of the Comcast acquisition of NBC Universal, Franken singled out the corporate giant.

Alleging that the cable company wants "to put Netflix out of business entirely" due to their streaming video business that could pose as a threat to Comcast's cable franchise, he warned:

"In the end, the American people will end up paying a lot more for worse service."

He encouraged festival attendees to fight the political influence of the big telecom firms, saying:

"Unfortunately one thing these big corporations have that we don't is the ability to purchase favorable political outcomes. Big telecoms have lots of [lobbyists], and good ones, too. … The end of net neutrality would benefit no one but these corporate giants."

He ended his speech by encouraging people to fight to preserve net neutrality to avoid a future in which they're "stuck listening to the Black Eyed Peas and reminiscing about the days before you had to sell out to make it.”

Hipster Or Athlete


"Lenny Dykstra insists that he’s been listening to Odd Future since 2005."

This tumblr has potential only because the quotes are decent.

HERE

Rappers Looking Like Magicians is probably better.

Tough call.

Props for using Lenny Dykstra though.

I Heart The Internets


All up in your ear hole.

Strictly For My G Chatz


As soon as I said this shit was dead this conversation happened.

Hopefully, I will be able to document the collective brilliance of SDTW in the written form more often.

Also:
Squeezer n. (noun)

A handjob that involves a tight grip of the shaft.

"People are starting to recognize me. A stripper offered me a squeezer last night dude.... a WHITE stripper!"

Face To Face Shooting In Bahrain



While you were watching an episode of Jersey Shore this happened.

SDTW Look Books Are For Assholes


Found a very subtle one here.

I almost missed it.

But if you look real closely you don't see a cool guy wearing a nice jacket you see a really fucking weird dude that naked wrestled with Jack Osbourne's fat ass on national television.

Now drink up

Monday, March 14, 2011

SDTW Photoshop Skillz


These things don't make themselves.

Metalachi



Dude nails the intro.

Check them out:

METALACHI.COM

Thanks ThatNiggaNick

Precious?

Golf Wang



Just waiting for Kanye to culture vulture these kids and ruin their music.

I Heart The Internets


Can't believe dude is still in the game.

Well played you crazy mother fucker.

Well played indeed.

Trout Art Supply


Support American dudes that be selling that American paint.

Dude is on the front lines of the war for making rackable paint usable paint.

In other words when you buy fancy paint the terrorists win dawg.

They win.


Buy That Shit Player

Accurate Dialogue


Tell'em



They don't make em like they used to.

Do you really wanna know...


about some gangster shit?



By no means perfect, but an entertaining informative summary none the less.

Borrowed from HERE

Created by THESE DUDES

Support the homie JB...


I need THIS in an extra medium asap

Team Print Shop Bieber Shirt

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Raekwon


Have no idea of this is any good.

The "Butter Knives" track is pretty nice.

Decide for yourself.


GET IT HHHEEEERRRRREEEEEEE

Friday, March 11, 2011

Calling all internet conspiracy theorists...


Watch for the unknown object* that emerges from the wave at the far right side of the screen at the 2:04 mark.



Now as much as I would love to believe that some kind of alien, somalian pirate, building #7, mexican drug submarine, or even a super cool surf bro delivered a tsunami to shore and bounced back to some ball of aluminum foil orbiting this planet.... Oh, but I digress

Shit is terrible, hopefully the old US of A can lend Japan a hand and they can get back to making awesome stuff like this baby mop.

* - actually a helicopter shadow

hint: follow the line while dragging the video player in reverse

Meet The Real Scumbag Steve



My dude kicks some knowledge of the highest order.

Gems dropped:

"I'm more of a showman too."

"I think Uggs are over played, but it depends on how you wear them."

Speak on it God.

SDTW Look Books Are For Assholes


Haven't had any coffee so instead of writing out why this "look book photo is for assholes" I will just allow you guess what I would say.

Hintety hint hint