Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Who Gives A Shit x Completely Unnecessary


Stop it.

Nobody needs some "old timey" coffee/soup thermos and collaborative holster. The fuck is the holster for? You planning on getting into a soup shoot out in Wholefoods homie?

Never not ever has someone been like "Man, this thermos is tight, but if I just had some other way to hold it,".

Well, if we are inventing more completely useless shit why not just make a bag for your wallet? A clock for your watch? Shoe lace holders?

Now some ol' pussy ass commenter might wanna jump in with their retarded ass two cents and say some shit like "Well, what if someone was going camping and wanted to bring their thermos? Then it sort of makes sense."

Oh, yeah. Great point. I mean when you go camping all you need is a fucking thermos filled with soup and the luxury of having your hands free. That shit might work if you're Bear Grylls and like drinking your own piss, but I imagine if you're going to go actual ass camping you might bring something more than Spaghetti O's and a strap holster.

Read how some taste maker blog struggles to describe the need to actually have this:

"You’d be hard-pressed to find two more iconic American brands than Filson & Stanley, which is really part of the charm of this piece, since it’s something you could envision you grandfather carrying to work each day."

I imagine my grandfather would have maybe had a thermos. I also imagine that in his time if he were to carry it in some over the shoulder holster that his friends would have called him a derogatory term used at the time like "candyass" as in:

"Hey fellas, look at Lowell and his fancy thermos purse. Nice thermos purse you fucking candy ass."

Just for context my grandpa was probably the toughest person I have ever known and smoked 4 packs of cigarettes a day. As far as I know he owned zero thermos purses.


3 comments:

  1. fucking gold my dude! fucking gold

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  2. this reminds me of the time i got a mount thing for christmas, to place my cellphone onto while charging, because putting it on the table/ground/whatever is tacky.

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  3. slap a supreme label on it and you got yourself a Krylon x Supreme can jockey.

    ReplyDelete